That Which You Could, but Don’t.
I have a couple of patients who are so inspirational, they just amaze me every time I see them. Although they are advanced in years, they are both in incredible physical condition.
Both of them have exercised for years, and are careful in their dietary choices. It’s not an exaggeration to say that either of them could completely out work me in the gym, and I am significantly younger than both of them.
But this post isn’t about being healthy.
Because I also have a friend who is incredibly successful financially. At age 19, while most of his friends were out partying and being ‘teenagers’, he began a business in his garage then eventually turned into a massive company which he was able to sell and travel the world, or at least until he got bored of living without a challenge and started a whole new company.
Because he loves to thrill of bringing his ideas to life, and serving people with his abilities.
The thing that links these remarkable people together is not their intellect, nor their inherited physical abilities. It’s certainly not their education level, nor their faith nor their backgrounds.
There’s one simple thing that stands out in their lives that has enabled them to go above and beyond what you normally find , and into the realm of being truly amazing.
They did something.
Which sounds simple, yet is the single biggest difference between the lives of people who are happy, and those who just complain about everything.
Because rarely do I find those who are busy doing things complaining about life, and rarely do I find those who are complaining about life to be doing anything worthwhile or extraordinary. And I think it has to do with the mindset of those who ‘do’, rather than those who ‘don’t’.
Those who complain are essentially admitting defeat, and looking for sympathy.
Now, before you pick up your pitchfork and hunt me down, let me clarify so you understand. When I say complaining, what I mean is essentially asking for sympathy about a situation that you could change if you decided to, but don’t, either because you don’t know how, or you’re scared to try.
Talking about a problem to understand it better, or to ask for help in executing your solution, or even trying to find a solution is not complaining. Those are all problem-focused conversations, and people who are ‘doing something’ have those all the time.
But complaining, just because you want the attention – that’s just cyanide to your sense of self.
And before you think I’m being cruel let me tell you, I’ve been a complainer, and was for many, many years. I can tell you from bitter painful personal experience that complaining does nothing for you, except diminish your soul, and damage your psyche.
The only antidote to it is self awareness, and then self actualization.
If you want to feel good about yourself, you have to do things for which you can feel good about.
And I’m guessing if you have a deep, long and honest conversation with yourself, you know there are things that you could do, but aren’t yet. Maybe it’s losing weight. Maybe it’s saving instead of spending.
Maybe it’s working on the things you need to, instead of wasting time on the internet looking at all the things you want to do, but can’t yet, because you haven’t DONE the things you need to, to be able to afford the things you want to do.
You know what I’m talking about don’t you? :)
So today, my invitation to you is to DO something. Whatever it may be, however it can affect you, the difference in your life is not what you could do, but what you are actually doing. The people who have the lives that stand out, are the people who stood out, while everyone else was too busy blending in.
I don’t think you’re one of the people, otherwise you wouldn’t be reading this work.
Most of us have a 3-day weekend ahead of us, and even those of us who don’t still have the time to DO something.
May we make it count.
Dr. Alan Barnes
@maddrbmusings