I Want To Believe.
If you ever watched the show “The X-Files”, chances are you saw a poster in the small office that was shared by Fox Mulder & Dana Scully. The picture featured a UFO with a caption underneath.
It stated simply “I Want To Believe”. And while I don’t know where I stand on the concept of little green men in flying saucers dropping by to hang out and watch us get on with our lives, I do know this much.
What we believe is very often determined by what we want.
I had a wonderful conversation with one of my favorite patients this evening. We share somewhat differing views on the concept of an afterlife, and what that would look like, and what we would do there.
As we gave freely of our opinions, it became very clear to me that our wants (and I mean our deeper psychological wants, which are really expressions of our non-critical needs) were coloring our thoughts and hopes.
We all do it, even when we are aware of it.
And it doesn’t have to be in the concept of spirituality. If you look at the realm and conflict of politics, you’ll find the very same expressions of ‘belief’ occurring, just in a more directed and focused way.
Maybe one person favors a more regimented society because what they really want is the absence of chaos, which is an anathema to their soul, while another person favors a much freer society with less rules and restrictions, because what they secretly want in their deepest heart is to be themselves without the risk of not being accepted.
Those may sound like simplifications, and maybe they are for some, but for others it’s the absolute truth.
It especially shows up in the values that we hold dear. A person who values a certain characteristic may do so out of a deep desire not to be seen as someone who acts of believes a certain way, or their aspiration for people to be treated a certain way.
In this, their ‘belief’ becomes the very manifestation of their desire, be it from a place of darkness, or a beacon of light.
And if we are not aware of our reasons, our ‘wants’ can drive our beliefs into a paradox of suffering.
Because if you look around at your world, there are so many things that fall into a concept of belief more than a absolution of knowledge. Outside of the ‘hard sciences’, most everything falls into a pit of possibility rather than a crucible of certainty.
Even this work is an act of belief, coming from the idea that I could be of help in this world, and that people are happier both individually and as a society with a heightened self awareness and a greater sense of internal peace. Yet the very awareness that I desire for my soul suggests that maybe this work is just because I want to feel like I have made a difference.
There are always more questions.
If I can offer you one thought (or belief, depending upon how you look at it) to think about today, I would ask you to consider any beliefs you have that may be impacting another in a negative way, and see where those beliefs (wants) are coming from.
It may be, as you consider and become more aware of yourself, that you can feel differently about something by understanding the reason that you believe it, and in so doing, find a greater pathway to peace within you and around you.
May we find a greater sense of peace and harmony as we do this work together.
Dr. Alan Barnes
@maddrbmusings