The Dark Night of The Soul.
Have you ever been to your own personal hell? I ask because I think most of us at some point in our lives have experienced a night where it seemed like the world was coming to an end.
Not literally, although those can happen as well, but one of those nights where it just feels like you’re going to lose everything that means anything, and that the world will never be the same again.
If you don’t know what I’m talking about, hang in there, it will find you.
But I’m guessing if you read this work, then you’ve had at least one time where the light seemed to fade from your world, and darkness seemed to be the only avenue left on your journey.
Somehow, someway, you seem to survive, but for that night, sleep was probably never going to happen and hope was running faster than you could keep up.
In personal development, this is known as the dark night of the soul.
Hopefully these are few and far between for you, as they have been for me. I had one recently, and I spent most of the night trying to think my way through a situation that was incredibly painful, and which felt hopeless.
At 3am, I sat in front of my computer, trying to write out my feelings as a way to process them in the hope that I might find a way to move beyond how I felt right then.
Even though it hurt, writing helped me to find a light out of the darkness.
That’s not so say that what I had to do after that was easy; far from it. What it did do was help me to get clear on the fact that there WAS a way forwards. It certainly wasn’t going to be painless, and neither was it going to be fun, but the way was open, as long as I was prepared to walk it.
And so I did. One painful step in front of the other, until I found myself on the other side of the problem.
Realizing that I had survived another trip into the darkness, and had come out still in one piece.
And in hindsight, going through that difficult experience had actually made me stronger. I was reminded that the Japanese art of making a Katana, a sword for the Samurai, involved heating the metal and beating it over and over and over again.
Time after time in the flame. Time after time under the hammer. Heat and pressure, pressure and heat. Until the sword is forged into perfection, ready to go out into the world.
While I can’t say I’m ready yet, I can say with some confidence that I have grown through my trials, and often at the time that has seemed the darkest, I have found within me the strength and the courage to grow and become more. It’s never easy, and during the process it is never fun, but the outcome is often something far better than it seemed when everything was going wrong.
And there are times when I need to remind others of this, and times when I need to be reminded of it myself.
Because as I sit here at my keyboard, tonight has already slipped into tomorrow, and once again I am facing a night and a morning that seem rather uncertain.
Life, in its infinite capabilities, picked the day right before our vacation weekend, to throw us a curve ball of epic proportions. One that has the potential to change everything in our lives all over again, and not necessarily for the better.
.
And so my role tonight is to seek the light, and forge the pathway forwards, knowing that the pressure can be used for my benefit, and the heat is there move me forwards when otherwise I would want to quit.
For in the darkest night is where the winners are forged.
Next time you go through one, I pray you will remember these words, and find the light that is there for you.
— Dr. Alan Barnes
@maddrbmusings