In a rented beach house on the coast of northern Oregon, I find myself face to face with the enormity of the Pacific Ocean.
Standing here on the deck, looking out over the waves, I see into nothingness. The relentless sound of the water crashing into the sand reassures me that time is as it has always been, and that long after I have slipped the bonds of this life, there will still be an ocean, still be the waves.
For in the span of my life, this ocean is eternal.
And yet, in the course of the universe in which we currently play, even the timeline of this ocean is less than forever. I am reminded that this ball of rock to which we cling had its beginning, and will yet see an end. In the course of events that govern the rise and fall of realities, even the life of a mere planet is a plaything of some small consequence.
What was before, and what will be after – no-one truly knows.
In this moment, as I smell the salt in the air, and feel the increased moisture gently blown onto my skin, hearing the pulse of the earth expressed in a movement of water reminds me that the only time I am promised is this one, right now.
Tomorrow is a possibility, and yesterday only a memory. If I free myself from the concept of time, and drift in the now, I can find the hints and prospects of a potential eternity whispering to my soul.
It seems that the only way to truly experience eternity is to let it slip between our fingers in favor of a powerful and ever present now.
Yet I am mindful that I cannot always ignore the future, and since I have lived the past, it must have some value, some meaning. Since they must always be a part of me, I seek instead to find a balance, knowing that all things exist to teach me wisdom, if I am willing to learn from them, and that some stories repeat over and over until I have finally understood the lesson.
That I may live my life how I wish, but I may not exchange the consequences of that living.
And the greatest responsibility I have in the use of my time is solely to myself. In the end, how I choose to invest my moments will impact me more than anyone else. Some I may spend in quiet introspection, with others I may choose wild abandon.
Yet there is no way that I can retrieve either from the past, and neither can I subtract the outcome of those moments from my future.
Time is interconnected, and linear only unto now.
So your choice right now, today, tomorrow and in whatever future is unveiled unto you, is to spend your time in the way that seems best. Your gift, your blessing, and possibly your curse is that your life is yours.
While it can be impacted and shaped by others, in the end, only you can live your life here and now. It seems that we cannot outsource the responsibility for our own eventuality.
So how should you choose?
If I might offer one suggestion, it would simply be this… that you order your time and your life in such a way that you need as little as possible in each moment to find peace and happiness. Whether that means freeing your mind from the shackles of imagined wants and desires, or training your body in such a way that you can enjoy each moment in as much health as is available to you.
Because the moment that needs nothing else is a pathway into a life of eternity.
The art of the expenditure of time is the balance of yesterday, today and tomorrow with the ever-present and eternal now, such that you may find as much peace and joy as may be taken from any moment.
That the birthright of any human, any consciousness, should be so, is my wish.
Today, and always.
— Dr. Alan Barnes
@maddrbmusings